Friday, September 18, 2009

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Dear “Name Not Given”,

Kindly blogger Nantoka said it was O.K. for me to use this page to attempt to contact you regarding my desperate situation. She says she has more ambient findability than she wants and I am welcome to all I can use.

My name is Santa. Not “Santa”…Actual Santa. And I am writing to you because I am in very hot waters with the wife, the bank, and the fan base. AKA Nantoka said you are a very creative person whose mind, once wrapped around my troubles, would likely find a solution where I can envision none whatsoever.

So, here are the hot waters I am in: I sort of took out a teeny tiny home equity loan on the North Pole lair. And it sort of blew up into a gigantic mess, thanks to inflation and property taxes and the rugrats wanting more stuff every year. Anyway, I am very afraid that once word gets out about how hopeless the situation has become with this blasted loan, Santa is going to be out of a home, a gig, a wife, a fan base and a positive reputation. And that is putting it mildly.

“Name Not Given”, if you can think of any way at all to help me I would appreciate it very much, even if it is an opportunity for me to wash dishes in your cafeteria or to hawk your arts factory products at crafts fairs. Please, “Name Not Given”, give me a chance and you will not be sorry. I promise to reach a reasonable weight and to stop acting as a mouthpiece for colonial values. I will give all my un-repossessed items of value to your favorite charitable cause. And I can even coach you if you want to play Father Kitty Christmas at the Ayuwa’sifest Christmas pageant! (AKA Nantoka told me she heard a rumor that Pet Welfare Fest organizers consider you to be the #1 choice for this role.)

Yours very truly and hopefully,
Santa Claus

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Symposium article from ameinfo.com

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy 11-27-08

hello everyone, I hope you are having a beautiful day so far.

today will be a busy day for me, and not just because I am helping the renowned Secret Chef M. (of Snaque Shaque fame) prepare the table today. since today is a day of counting blessings I am unlikely to have a moment to spare in cataloging the ways in which it has rained Grace on me and my household over the course of my life. so, this will be a brief post but I promise to get back with you as soon as I can to keep you posted on all the "do-in's" of the Snaque Shaque, the Coldwater Museum, and the Ayuwa'si Holocaust Awareness Facility & Retreat Center.

if you are impatient for news about these places please try to be patient, and do not pester the folks who work in any of the realms mentioned above. they are doing there best to wire the Trail of No Tears for the big happy upcoming ceremony which shall remain nameless until further notice, so that no lending institutions can snarf up the creative works which are being created for this event.

impatient and hungry lending institutions are encouraged to WAIT YOUR EFFING TURN, as a VERY special menu item is being prepared for you, just 'cause your Aunti Nantoka loves you so very very very much. ha ha ha ha ow ow ow ow.

bye, thanks for reading, have a beautiful day. -Suzy

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

happy 11-24-08

hello everyone, I hope you are having a very nice day. I am well and working hard to inflate the value of Crying Helicopters stock, so don't let any rumors etc. get in your way of the wealth you stand to gain if you stick with, or begin to stick with, this Trustworthy Brand.

have a beautiful day, take care. -Suzy

Sunday, September 21, 2008

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hi there everyone
hope you are having a lovely day

in just a few months it will be the tenth anniversary of the raid at Camp Coldwater.
if you would like to donate supplies to help out with the Potlatch 2.0 planned to mark this milestone, please stay tuned.

also please note: on 10-11-08 you will be in good company if you speak up about the evils of irresponsible surveillance. I will post more info on this when I can.

here is a handy dandy form for folks who feel like complaining to the feds about how they have been treated by a lending institution.

hopefully your life story has not been as rich as mine in lending industry adventures. if so, I hope you will keep Shouseki gun laws in mind when musing on your past and present circumstances. using a gun to clear your head of these stories will not wash with the Shouseki authorities if it can be proven that you had even a teensy bit of ability to use a pen or pencil to accomplish the same goal.

more lending industry fairy tales at 11.

Love, Suzy

Saturday, September 20, 2008

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hi everyone. now I am ready to tell some lending industry adventure stories. I hope these will be useful to you. I hope you will find some good info within my stories which will help you accumulate a good credit rating within your credit rating framework of choice.*

now since this is a lending industry adventure story, you should have a hanky and a pen within easy reach. please, please, please do not keep a loaded gun within easy reach if you are currently shopping for seppuku options, no matter how casually. the rivers of misery in the tale I am about to tell could ooze into your brain and accidentally trigger a Shouseki gun law violation, to wit: the law in which persons shall not use a self-inflicted firearm wound to settle a debt with a credit card company.

so now that we have the rules of the storytelling parlor more or less laid out, here is how my tale begins: Muka-a-a-a-a-ashi mukashi, way back in the day of one forever ago, a little Someone walked into a lending institution and struck what she though was a fabulous deal with an associate there. this deal would enable food, ikigai farming tools, etc. to flow to the Someone's household on the basis of something called "credit", which was extended to the Someone on the basis of her having something called "income".

to be continued....

happy 9-20

hi everyone, happy 9-20. hope it is a beautiful day where you are.

things here are fine. Cleo is fine, I am fine, and feel ready to begin sharing tales of my adventures with the lending industry soon. if you have some lending industry tales to share, by all means please begin documenting them now as the Traces library will be harvesting such stories in the near future for use in creating the Big Mountain branch.

ja ne, have a beautiful day. -Suzy